"You Shall Not Commit Adultery" (Part 3)
[Editor's note: This article continues with 25 reasons not to commit adultery; it was first published in Biblical Ethics, edited by Terry Hightower for the Sixth Annual Shenandoah Lectures, pages 262-281.]
5. God's punishment (2 Sam. 12:10-12). Even though David repented of his sin, he still had to endure the penalty. God did not put him to death (Lev. 20:10), but neither did He exempt him from the sin's consequences. First, Nathan told him that "the sword shall never depart from your house." It surely can be regarded as no light penalty for one's family to be plagued by turmoil and death (Amnon and Tamar, Absalom, Adonijah. We know that David felt intense anguish because of Absalom's death (2 Sam. 18:33).
Second, though David's adultery had been secret and private, the violation of his concubines would be open and public, "in the sight of all Israel" (2 Sam. 16:21-22). What an embarrassment for them as well as David.
Third, the child conceived from the adulterous parents would die. David fasted, prayed, and wept over the child, desiring that God would relent and let the child live (2 Sam. 12:15-23), but the king's sincere repentance and remorse could not prevail with God in this matter.
Yet David could count himself fortunate that God punished him in these ways, for "whom the Lord loves, He corrects" (Prov. 3:12). Fortunately, David responded in the proper manner to his chastisement; many would continue to practice sexual immorality despite God's loving rebuke.
6. The loss of godly influence (2 Sam. 12:14). The fact is that our godly example is one of our key resources in evangelism. Some people like nothing better than to remind us of the tarnished image of a fallen Christian. Even though Jimmy Swaggart is not part of the church, many people view him as a representative of Christianity. They rejoice in his demise. Why? Because they like to think that all Christians are hypocrites and that nobody is really any better than they are. Perhaps if we are all corrupt, then God won't condemn any of us. They should read 1 Peter 1:16 and think again.
"A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches" (Prov. 22:1). How can we be salt or light with a sullied reputation? Christians cannot have a positive effect on the world if we engage in the same immoral activities that they do. We must jealously guard our good names and refrain from any sin that would reflect poorly upon our God. Nathan told the man after God's own heart": "…by this deed you have given great occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme" (2 Sam. 12:14).
7. "Committing Adultery is the way to destruction" (Prov. 2:18-19; 5:4-5, 11, 14, 21-23; 6:26-29, 32-33; 7:22-23, 25-27; 9:18; and 23:27-28). Some of the unflattering descriptions of the man giving in to this temptation warn him of the immoral woman: "Her house leads down to death"; "Her steps lay hold of hell"; he is "on the verge of total ruin"; "he is caught in the cords of his sin"; he is "reduced to a crust of bread"; he is "as an ox going to the slaughter"; and "her guests are in the depths of hell."
These passages indicate three truths about the person who commits adultery: 1) that he will suffer for his lustful ways; 2) that sexual indiscretion is addictive ("None who go to her return, nor do they regain the paths of life"—Prov. 2:19); and 3) they will suffer eternally.
8. Committing adultery is a sin against God (Gen. 39:9). Joseph recognized this principle long before the Law of Moses was ever given. Potiphar's wife tried everything within her power to adulterate her marriage, but Joseph refused, saying, "How then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God?"
Sure, Joseph would have sinned against himself ("…but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body"—1 Cor. 6:18). And he would have wronged Potiphar (Gen. 39:8-9). It is frequently true that many innocent people become hurt when two people give themselves over to this brief pleasure; but primarily we act corruptly and affront a holy God.
9. Adultery is disobedience against a righteous God. To do that which clearly contradicts what God says is disobedience. God says, "You shall not commit adultery" (Ex. 20:14). No plainer definition of disobedience could be given than to do the very thing God forbids. We ought to remember that "every transgression and disobedience received a just recompense of reward" (Heb. 2:2). No one disobeys a holy and just God with impunity.
The above statement also includes those who are unlawfully divorced and "married" again. When Herodias dumped her husband Philip in favor of Herod, John told him, "It is not lawful for you to have your brother's wife" (Mark 6:18). This form of adultery is just as disobedient as any other.
The reasons presented thus far for rejecting unscriptural divorce and subsequently "marrying" again ought to be sufficient to dissuade anyone from engaging in sexual immorality. The fact that we sin against God ought to deter us from the practice, but the Bible provides other reasons that we ought to as well. First, however, consider one that may not be referenced in the Scriptures.
10. Adultery and fornication can easily result in unscheduled trips to the doctor for treatment of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). This is as good a time as any to point out that many of the problems that have been highlighted in connection with adultery can also be listed as warnings against the popular practice of fornication (sexual license among those who are unmarried).
So much has been emphasized about AIDS that we hardly need to do more than refer to it. Scarcely a newspaper is published or a talk show completed without some reference to the subject. AIDS is transmitted through sexual contact. But so are gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, and Herpes Simplex II.
In fact, according to the Peoria Journal Star, which quoted federal officials, "the nation's syphilis rate has reached its highest point in more than four decades" (A-2). In January and March of 1991, Ann Landers published letters from two women who had contracted the herpes virus, even though (and note this carefully) condoms were used in both instances,
We might feel confident that the person we are "having the affair" with is sexually safe and faithful as well. But if she cheated on her husband, why wouldn't she cheat on you? Come to think of it, if you cheated on your wife, wouldn't you cheat on your lover if another woman came along? As one of the unfortunate women wrote, "No sex is worth the price I'm paying."
11. Revenge. "For jealousy is a husband's fury; therefore, he will not spare in the day of vengeance. He will accept no recompense…" (Prov. 6:33-34). What a theme in literature! The occasion of the Trojan War was Paris' stealing of Helen from Menelaus. The tragic flaw of Othello was allowing himself to be convinced that his wife Desdemona was unfaithful without adequate evidence; tragically, he sought revenge upon an innocent and pure woman. And who could forget the Satanic Roger Chillingworth exacting his revenge against the already-suffering minister Dimmesdale in Hawthorne's masterpiece, The Scarlet Letter?
There must be a number of versions of the "Frankie and Johnny" story—"he was her man, but he done her wrong." In ancient literature (Lysias 1.30), "Lysias (c. 410 B.C.) wrote of one Euphiletus, an Athenian, who killed Eratosthenes, after catching him in bed, committing adultery with his wife. In his defense he contends that the Court of Areopagus has 'expressly stated that whoever takes vengeance on an adulterer (moichon) caught in the act with his spouse shall not be convicted of murder'" (Jackson 26). No doubt that even today many individuals and some juries would consider a jealous husband's killing of his wife and/or her lover "justifiable homicide." Even "civilized" people have difficulty restraining themselves from revenge.
12. Unbalanced lover. "Her ways are unstable; you do not know them" (Prov. 5:6). Suppose a man meets a woman, and they are physically attracted to one another. The relationship progresses rapidly; they commit sexual sin. But how much do they really know of each other's mental stability?
Two movies on this same theme sufficiently demonstrate the risks. The earlier one was titled, Play "Misty" for Me (1971). The more recent one was Fatal Attraction (1987). In both cases a woman seduces a man, then refuses to let him go. She threatens him, pesters him, and even attempts to kill him. Perhaps such a mental condition is a little more than the Scriptures had in mind, but it's worth thinking about. Even if she is not a psychopath, how does a man know that she will not blackmail him or ruin his life in some other way? The point is that the two don't really know one another; the sin of adultery incurs God's wrath without question and opens one up to more risks than a person might imagine.
13. The male as a useful tool. Men have the notorious reputation of viewing women as mere sexual objects who only exist to satisfy fleshly appetites. Yet the very opposite may also be true. Some women may consider a man as no more than a handy device by which to have a child. Tamar once donned the attire of a harlot to entrap Judah because he had not given his third son to her as husband. She achieved her goal of becoming pregnant (Gen. 38).
She did not love Judah, nor did he love her. He was widowed at this time, and she was not married; so they did not commit adultery. But they were sexually immoral. Judah thought he was using her to meet sexual needs he still felt. How he must have felt when he learned that Tamar was the one who was using him. He was nothing more than a tool serving a useful function.
In 1990, the rock group Heart recorded a song about a married woman who seduced a hitchhiker for the same purpose—to have a child that her husband was unable to provide ("All I Want to Do Is Make Love to You"). The possibility of such an occurrence may not be great, but men must consider it: does that new-found lover have some ulterior motive in mind? Is she just using him?
14. Committing adultery (for most of us) would be a denial of everything we have been taught (Prov. 5:12): "How I have hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof!" Who in the Lord's church does not know that adultery violates God's moral code? That it is a work of the flesh (Gal. 5:19)? That those who practice it cannot inherit the kingdom of God (1 Cor. 6:9)? That it would be wickedness—iniquity worthy of judgment (Job 31:11)? How must those who loved us enough to teach us God's ways feel to see us give in to such common corruption? God could have delivered us from it, had we asked (John 10:27-29; 1 Cor. 10:13) [to be continued].