The Danger of "to Me" Ism

Recently, your congenial editor came across a certain point of view in a magazine that has legitimacy. The author, Mark Lages, is a retired general building contractor who is working on a degree in psychology from Pepperdine University.¹ He credits the following observation to comedian George Carlin: "when we're driving in our cars, whoever is driving slower than us is an idiot, and whoever wants to drive faster is a maniac." Certainly, there's an element of truth in that still. One of the common problems nowadays involves being behind the person who remains stationary after the light turns green—because he is talking on the phone.

Lages says that a key problem in society today is that "we talk about our opinions as if they are universal truths." He provides an example regarding the temperature in a room. Some will say unequivocally, "It's too hot!" Others will complain that the temperature is too cold and accompany the pronouncement with shivers. In other words, as we have heard since the 1960s, "It's all relative." Lages' suggested solution is that we qualify our statements by saying, "to me." No one needs to be taught to do that. In our family (and this was back in the 1970s and 1980s), if someone said, it was hot or cold or even wet, another would respond, "Not to me." We didn't have to pay for a university degree to obtain this perspective.

The danger of this approach is that everything can become subjective, and objective truth falls by the wayside. Lages concludes that the other driver on the road is probably neither stupid nor a maniac. This deduction is simply not true. When a car comes seemingly out of nowhere, is clearly going 60 mph on a road with a 40 mph speed limit, and squeezing between the cars in two different lanes, he (or she) is driving like a maniac. Such is not an opinion equal to all other opinions. The person ought to be arrested and his license suspended for endangering other motorists. Anyone who saw a video of this reckless driving pattern would draw the same conclusion. It is not merely opinion.

If most actions become opinions, then where does that leave absolute truth, which does exist? Following is a brief list of truths that have been successfully debated. The Bible is the inspired Word of God. Jesus is the Son of God. Only through Jesus can anyone come to God. In order to be saved, one must have faith in God (believe the evidence He has provided). Unless people repent of their sins, they shall all perish. Heaven and Hell are actual spiritual places. Every person will stand before the judgment seat of Christ and be assigned to one of those places. The blood of Christ cleanses people of their sins when they are baptized. One must live according to the Scriptures.

¹Mark Lages, "Naïve Realism," Mensa Bulletin (June 2025): 58.