Spiritual Perspectives
10. In fact, love for one another demands that brethren "serve one another" (Gal. 5:13). Certainly, it is the philosophy of the world to ask, "What can you do for me?" Just as Jesus' teachings in the "beatitudes" do not coincide with the world's notions of happiness, neither does His philosophy of inter-personal relationships. Many people hold the utilitarian view of: "I want you around if you can do something for me." But God says, in effect: "Don't worry about what others can do for you; determine what you can do for them." We live in a society that is self-absorbed, always concerned about getting what they think they deserve…. The "golden rule" has vanished from the public view. But in the church we are free to be unselfish, kind, and caring—happy and satisfied to serve one another.
11. Brethren ought to bear "one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2). There are many types of burdens that life thrusts upon us: from the loss of a loved one to difficulties at the work place or with family members—things that often times cannot be changed or improved—only endured. Spiritually speaking, some may be burdened with past sins they have committed; others may be facing current temptations. A few might be at the point of despair: They have tried overcoming obstacles to the faith and have been too weak to succeed; they have just given up. What a difference a brother or a sister might make in the life of one who feels alone, as if "no man cared for my soul" (Psa. 142:4). We can seldom solve each other's problems, but we can be a source of encouragement and function as burden-bearers.
12. Far too often Christians have fallen short in "forbearing one another in love" (Eph. 4:2; Col. 3:13). How ironic that in the world tolerance has been over-emphasized, but in the church it has been under-rated! Some are too quickly critical, and some are too easily offended…. When disagreements arise, how swiftly does the matter become an "us" versus "them" situation? Healthy doses of humility, meekness, and patience would help us to forbear (Eph. 4:2). Our brethren are never going to be any more perfect than we are; they will never live up to our expectations of them any more than we will never fail to disappoint them. We must anticipate that conflicts will arise and be prepared to forbear one another.
13. Closely associated with forbearance is "forgiving one another" (Col. 3:13). Sometimes, it almost seems as if some are on the lookout for possible offenses being committed against them…. Some imagine slights and insults that were never intended; such attitudes do not reflect a proper disposition toward brethren. A forgiving person dismisses immediately those nagging thoughts that a fellow Christian has transgressed against him. The Lord gave us a way to clear up ambiguous situations: talk to the suspected offender—alone! If there was nothing to it, no one else needs to know. If there is a real problem, take others to establish the facts (Matt. 18:15-17). When we make mistakes, we need to repent of them; when others sin against us and repent, we must extend the same forgiveness we would want for ourselves. If God cannot despise a humble and contrite heart, neither should we (Psa. 51:16-17). Let us forgive those who have trespassed against us (Mat. 6:12, 14-15).
14. Members of the body of Christ should "be kind to one another, tenderhearted" (Eph. 4:32). This command involves more than just abstaining from harming someone. We cannot merely refrain from evil and then deduce that we have been kind. We should determine to say something of a positive nature to others. A kind word costs little, but it provides a lift to others. Gratuitous flattery will be seen for what it is; sincerity must accompany kindness. How many days have been made brighter by opening an appreciation card with some encouraging comments inside? It is always helpful to know that, despite whatever problems we are facing at the moment, our brethren care about us.
15. An extension of kindness is hospitality. Brethren are commanded: "Be hospitable to one another without grumbling" (1 Pet. 4:9, NKJ). How interesting that being hospitable might cause one to grumble! Not only must we practice it; we must like it, too. Christians are to be "given to hospitality" in general (Rom. 12:13)…. Acts of hospitality included providing a place to stay (along with the amenities) and furnishing food for guests. What possessions do we have that God has not blessed us with? Should these be reserved for ourselves alone or put to use on the Lord's behalf? Brethren need to be invited into our homes; the fellowship strengthens the body of Christ.
16. Christians also have a responsibility to comfort and "exhort one another" (1 Thess. 5:11). The same Greek word is translated either way in both its noun and verb forms…. Barnabas is known chiefly for his comforting and exhortation; he is called the "son of consolation" (KJV) or the "Son of Encouragement" (Acts 4:36, NKJ). The Holy Spirit is known as the Comforter (John 14:26), but we are also to comfort one another with such things as the doctrine of Christ's Second Coming (1 Thess. 4:18). We are able to console one another in times of tribulation, as Paul wrote:
Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, The Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God (2 Cor. 1:3-4).
But exhort one another daily, while it is called To day; lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin (Heb. 3:13).
The same word is used to describe our responsibility to prohibit brethren from forsaking the assembling of ourselves together (Heb. 10:25). We ought always to be an available help to each other in terms of comfort and exhortation.
17. Of course, the above expressions of love work best if we are willing to submit ourselves "one to another in the fear of God" (Eph. 5:21). We know that we are to submit ourselves to God (Jam. 4:7) and that the church is commanded to be "subject unto Christ" (Eph. 5:24), but how can we all "be subject one to another" (1 Pet. 5:5)? That same verse advises us to be "clothed with humility." When we are exhorted or rebuked, we should not become defensive (which is so easy to do), combative, or vengeful. We should realize that someone has loved us enough and taken his time to communicate to us a problem to which we need to respond. …submitting ourselves to one another is in our own best interests. The best friend we will ever have is the one who, knowing that we might not take it well, will nevertheless rebuke us.
18. James writes: "Confess your faults one to another…" (James 5:16). This command does not authorize "prayer partners" or require brethren to elicit details…that no one needs to know…. But when sinful behavior has been exhibited or error has been taught, then the person in question must admit, not deny, what he has done. Brethren who are willing to forgive (as all should be) can put the problem aside quickly—if it is acknowledged.
19. James adds after the above exhortation: "…and pray one for another" (James 5:16). Paul frequently mentioned praying for brethren (Eph. 3:14-19; Phil. 1:9-11). He also asked brethren to pray for each other—and him as well (Eph. 6:18-20). Intercessory prayer is obviously of great value. Christians ought to remember in their prayers those who have confessed their sins and are in need of spiritual strength. We may also pray for the spiritual well-being and enrichment of all, those who have fallen away, the faithful proclamation of the Word on the part of those who are teaching and preaching, those who have recently experienced grief, and those who have difficult decisions to make. We will probably never know this side of eternity how much good has been accomplished through our efforts.
20. Church members are to use whatever talents and abilities they have to "minister the same one to another" (1 Pet. 4:10). Many brethren have profited each other in physical ways. Some excel in their abilities to build or repair; others have mechanical or medical knowledge. Shared information can be quite useful, but the context of this passage indicates spiritual abilities. Possessing the finest talents in the church will avail nothing, however, if we do not use them for each other's benefits. How many would have been left in darkness and misery if Jesus had kept to Himself His knack for teaching and His power to heal? How many Christians would have become backsliders without Paul's verbal and written exhortations to remain faithful? How many were discouraged because Demas folded his tent and went home? Paul put the needs of brethren first: "So being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the gospel of God only, but also our own souls, because ye were dear to us" (1 Thess. 2:8). We likewise need to unselfishly minister to one another.
The previous twenty admonitions were all of a positive nature—things we ought to do for one another. These final ten dwell on things we ought not do to ourselves. Most of these seem rather obvious, but every one of these sins has been committed against brethren.
21. "Grudge not one against the other, brethren, lest ye be condemned…" (James 5:9). In the noun form this Greek word is translated "groaning" (Acts 7:34; Rom. 8:26); as a verb it is translated "sighed" (Mark 7:34), "groan" (2 Cor. 5:2, 4), "with grief" (Heb. 13:17). Why must we abstain from this kind of mutual treatment? One reason is that it is counter-productive in encouraging and comforting each other; the second reason is supplied by James: "Behold, the judge standeth before the door" (James 5:9). Groaning against a brother is also probably going to lead to some of the other actions prohibited below. The time to stop the harm from escalating is in the complaining stage.
22. "Let us not therefore judge one another any more…" (Rom. 14:13). Obviously, this admonition does not include areas of life in which we are violating the Word of God; in such cases we have a responsibility to speak. The context of Romans 14 reveals that we are not to judge each other in matters of judgment. One eats meat (formerly forbidden under the Law of Moses), but another finds the practice repulsive. If a practice is authorized by God (and the eating of all meats was, after the Law was nailed to the cross—Acts 10:9-16), then our attitudes become preferences, not law. One person might say, "I could never do that," which is fine; no one was required to eat those meats. The problem begins with a person thinking, "Since I can't do it; nobody should do it. It is wrong to do it." No one has the right to bind a preference—or to think less of a brother who chooses to exercise his freedom in Christ. We must stand firm on the teachings of Christ and refuse to judge in matters of option.
23. Another danger to watch out for is becoming "puffed up for one against another" (1 Cor. 4:6), which is the opposite of being kindly affectioned and submitting to one another. The Corinthians were evidently playing a game of "I'm better than you," or, "My spiritual teacher is better than your spiritual teacher." This Greek word is from one that means "a pair of bellows" (Vincent 2:766), thus conveying the "puffed up" image. The Corinthians also bragged about how much knowledge they had (1 Cor. 8:1) and how fluent they were in their foreign tongues (1 Cor. 12), as though Christians are to be in competition with each other. We are not each other's adversaries; we are each other's helpers. Our adversary is the devil (1 Peter 5:8); Christians are on the same side. Our overriding goal should be to help each other arrive intact to our heavenly destination. We ought to rejoice in every other child of God's spiritual successes. Jealousy and pride and wondering if we will get the credit we are due have no place in the life of a Christian. We really have no basis for being puffed up anyway; as Paul reminded these immature brethren: "And what do you have that you did not receive? Now if you did indeed receive it, why do you glory as if you had not received it?" (1 Cor. 4:7, NKJ). God is the one who deserves glory and praise—not us.
24. "Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old man with his deeds" (Col. 3:9, NKJ). Since Christians have been born again and are a new creation, we must jettison old habits and patterns of living, and for most Americans that includes lying. In 1991 a book by James Patterson and Peter Kim was published; the title of it was The Day America Told the Truth. Among other interesting items, their research revealed that "ninety-one percent of us lie regularly"; these are not spur-of-the-moment inventions but "conscious, premeditated lies." The authors concluded: "Lying has become a cultural trait in America. Lying is embedded in our national character" (Crismier 85). Those who become Christians will need to abandon this practice. God disapproves of it so strongly that He did not tolerate it when Ananias and Sapphira tried to deceive the church (Acts 5:1-11). Lies have been responsible for much evil in the world. Among the list of things that God hates from Proverbs 6 are "a lying tongue" (v. 17) and a "false witness that speaketh lies" (v. 19). This action is so repugnant to God that He has decreed that all liars shall have their place in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone (Rev. 21:8). Surely, Christians will not want to lie to one another.
25. Perhaps not unrelated to the two previous commands is this one set forth by James: "Speak not evil one of another, brethren…" (4:11). It is bad enough to judge a fellow Christian's motives; it is even worse to begin spreading around one's suspicions. If one has a legitimate grievance with a brother, Jesus provided a means of resolution (Matt. 18:15-17). No one needs to know the charges unless the person in question refuses to acknowledge his wrongdoing. Nothing needs to be spread around the congregation (or the brotherhood) until it is established that a legitimate problem exists. Again, we ought to treat others as we would want to be treated (Mat. 7:12).
26. Paul admonished the Galatians not to provoke or envy one another (5:26). While we are enjoined to "consider one another to provoke unto love and good works" (Heb. 10:24), we do not want to provoke one another in a negative way. The word used in Galatians means "to call forth to challenge to combat" (Robertson 4:314). What strange behavior to exercise against our fellow pilgrims! How we need to remember that the enemy is the devil, not ourselves! Again, the source of the discord may be rooted in envy. The problem in Galatia may have arisen from the Judaizing teachers who were insisting that the Law of Moses still be observed. Had two parties formed, both of whom were attempting to outdo the other? Paul did mention later that some preached Christ from the wrong motives (Phil. 1:16-17). Differences in doctrine must be resolved; we have an obligation to "be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment" (1 Cor. 1:10). Brethren must be united in our Gospel efforts—not rivals.
27. In the same passage in Galatians Paul warns the brethren not to "bite and devour one another," lest they be "consumed one of another" (5:15). Vincent says of the terms used here that they are "strong expressions of partisan hatred exerting itself for mutual injury" (2:996). This picture is a savage one; the combatants seem to be fighting to the death, with the destruction of each other being their steadfast commitment. Probably, Paul is using these terms to show the viciousness of brethren who go after each other relentlessly with a view toward cutting, tearing, and destroying each other's souls. How ironic that such verbal dogfights often break out only moments after singing, "Angry words, O let them never from the tongue unbridled slip," or "Blessed be the tie that binds our hearts in Christian love." How hard is it to see that something is wrong with such behavior? No wonder Solomon wrote: "Death and life are in the power of the tongue…" (Pr. 18:21). How many brethren have left the church (and ultimately lost their souls) because of the "deadly poison" in a brother's tongue (James 3:8)? Let us rather speak words of encouragement and edification.
28. Some have carried their grudges beyond the family of God. Paul asks: "Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints?" (1 Cor. 6:1). He charges that brethren ought to have enough wisdom to settle their own problems (v. 5) and that, if necessary, we allow ourselves to be defrauded (v. 7). Some would say, "What? Do you know how much money being silent is going to cost me?" We might ask in return, "How much is it going to cost the church when the community discovers that the adherents of this new religion cannot even get along with each other? Besides, it may not be a coincidence that Paul includes as causes for withdrawing fellowship from a brother the sins of thievery, covetousness, and extortion (1 Cor. 6:10). Some who call themselves brethren may get away with stealing from members of the church, but they will never inherit the kingdom of God. They have all the reward they will ever get. Faithful brethren should not let others despise the church.
29. "Do not sow discord one against another." Although there is not a verse that says these specific words, the very idea of sowing discord implies an intent to divide brother against brother. In the Old Testament God calls the one who sows discord among brethren an abomination (Pro. 6:19). The New Testament's doctrine concerning this subject is no less sobering: "If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are" (1 Cor. 3:17). Truly, such discord results from carnal-minded brethren, who envy, create strife, and cause divisions (1 Cor. 3:3). James told brethren not to glory if they had "bitter envying and strife" in their hearts (Jam. 3:14). Strife's motives are usually envy and arrogance. How else can Diotrephes be explained? How would anyone dare to refuse to receive an inspired apostle who knew Jesus personally, to speak against him with malicious words, and to go so far as to cast some brethren out of the church (3 John 9-10). Some so-called Christians possess no real love of God, respect for Christ or His church, or the Word inspired of the Holy Spirit; they think the church belongs to them and that it is theirs to do with as they will, like a child who has been given a new toy. Sowers of discord, who defile the temple of God with their ungodly antics, shall be destroyed by God (as shown above). It would be better in the judgment for them to have been an ignorant savage who never knew the Truth than to despise the spiritual blessings available to them so that they could usurp and exercise authority over others (cf., 2 Pet. 2:21).
30. Another practice of non-Christians (in addition to that of lying, as seen above) is "hating one another" (Titus 3:3). Surely, no child of God could be guilty of such a thing. Diotrephes must have been. John was aware of the overt animosity that some "brethren" possessed: "Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him" (1 John 3:15). This attitude goes far beyond "hating even the garment spotted by the flesh" (Jude 23); this individual has no desire to save the soul of the one he despises, which demonstrates his utter hatred of a brother in Christ and contempt for Jesus, who died for all—even while they were sinners (Rom. 5:8). We all must fight against sin—the lusts of the flesh, as well as false doctrine. We must, however, beware of transferring a member's conduct to that individual personally. What he does is different from who he is. We cannot afford to hate one another.